i had a more vitriolic post in mind when i was thinking of this entry. i was frustrated at a culmination of moments- and a specific type of frustrated too.
i've been party to many people who do things like what i do expressing dismay over a lack of progress, a lack of sales, etc, and asking the community- what's wrong with me? should i quit? i have only x number of progress points. and invariably, they've been at it less time than i and have made more, in various ways of looking at it, progress points.
note, i'm not talking about some rewards system, literal progress points, i'm just substituting that for number of sales, amount of income, etc, steps in the path of progress/success, however that individual defines such a goal for their own efforts. i'm not talking about stats, like in some rpg. (i think i could deal with this etsy experience if i viewed it more as a game part of me engages in, like a role playing game. STATS!)
[yelling "stats" is a shoutout to my husband, who nevertheless never reads this blog. that's okay, he has to live with me.]
anyway, to sum it all up it's discouraging. i am a competitive person, and so when i see the person who's publicly expressing their perceptions about their progress or lack thereof has more stats than i do, i get annoyed. i am trying to convince myself that i am annoyed because the person seems to be whining in a public forum, not that the person has more stats than me.
i think that the latter is a rather juvenile reaction, and the no whining thing is a bias of mine that makes the public a nicer place to be. but i'm being a bit judg-y and i try to be much more live and let live. in public anyhow. but the critic in my head still smokes cigarettes, and she still flicks the ashes from them rather sharply sometimes.
so what it amounts to, is that regardless of personal preference towards no whining, is that i do it anyway, on my blog, and that while i dislike it, i'll defend someone elses right to do it? eh, okay, not quite. but i will try to chill about it because everyone else's ideas about progress are different than mine, as are what feels like everyone else's production scale, budget, etc.
i think some of those etsy people out there have extra hours in their day. i'm suspecting that reality is just a little biased. (jokes! pointless accusations and jokes!)
and besides
i'd rather not dwell on that because i need more hours in my day. and because there's a lot to do.
and because
i had a Very Good Idea that i'd rather wallow in, instead.
a very very good one indeed.
who doesn't want a cape?
a goddess cape.
stay tuned. details at 11. or whenever.
2009/03/15
been working on the railroad...knitting
and wish it was going just a little faster. i might be having a bit of an attention deficit about it, but that doesn't mean i'm not enjoying this project. it would be totally cool if i hadn't gotten mostly finished with it and then dissatisfied with my results, taken it apart and began to re-work it. but, it is valuable as a learning experience.
(none of which means that learning experiences often don't suck. this is the beauty of a good leader, teacher, mentor, coach, whatever, is that they in some way alter/betterify [a new word] the learning experience. which involves mistakes and not being good at something.)
a rainy weekend, following a few gorgeous days that were work time. a little frustrating, but at least i'm not cooped up in an office.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
another sunday, another family dinner/lan party. cheese is what i want this evening, and vegetables and bread. and something dippy. and roasted garlic. i have a ton of different colors of bell pepper, but i think those will just be roasted, pureed and frozen. i'm not feeling bell peppery today.
nor, i suppose am i feeling very bloggery.
the tree outside the window looks poised to burst, perhaps explode, into bloom. i wonder what sort of tree it is.
(none of which means that learning experiences often don't suck. this is the beauty of a good leader, teacher, mentor, coach, whatever, is that they in some way alter/betterify [a new word] the learning experience. which involves mistakes and not being good at something.)
a rainy weekend, following a few gorgeous days that were work time. a little frustrating, but at least i'm not cooped up in an office.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
another sunday, another family dinner/lan party. cheese is what i want this evening, and vegetables and bread. and something dippy. and roasted garlic. i have a ton of different colors of bell pepper, but i think those will just be roasted, pureed and frozen. i'm not feeling bell peppery today.
nor, i suppose am i feeling very bloggery.
the tree outside the window looks poised to burst, perhaps explode, into bloom. i wonder what sort of tree it is.
2009/03/09
so i don't know if it's obvious by now or not
but for my dedicated readers (owls hooting, crickets chirping)- okay for anyone who's stumbled across my blog and read more than an entry or tow; it should be pretty obvious- i'm not good at a fixed schedule.
my mom no doubt, blames herself for this, and it's not for her lack of trying. sure, i get my days straight and am at work when i should be, but i'm not good when things are absolutely the same all the time. i create for myself wiggle room and then do sneaky things like sabotage my own plans by getting sick. example in point: last sunday's post that was never made up and languishes in my saved drafts file of oblivion. we won't even talk about how many saved drafts exist in my various google mail accounts. (let's be fair, i use them as notes to myself for things like upcoming column ideas, etc).
i have a set of bracelets that fears they will never see the light of day, i was derailed from that project, i think, a few weeks ago by needlefelting. i'm a little stuck on needlefelting at the moment and have been sidetracked again by a new/old favorite- railroad knitting.
it's also called afghan stitch, tunisian crochet and about a million other things, but since everyone assumes anything done with yarn and stick or sticks is knitting, i like the term railroad knitting. (i've also often considered getting a shirt that says something to the effect of, "no i'm crocheting" or a graphic of a hook and then an = crochet, but i'd hate to seem rude. plus it gives me a chance to talk to people a little bit about my much misunderstood art. craft. whatever.)
so i'm in the middle of a trade with a lovely etsian who wants a laptop sleeve to protect her precious in her backpack and sent out a call for knitters/crocheters. i guess i was the lucky winner, either that or she's got totally bored of waiting for me to get through my attention division/new job/sinus issues and has yet to let me know. she seems the gracious type though, so i think she may stick with me. i like the opportunity to try something new, especially with a captive audience, so the big old book of 101 tunisian/afghan/railroad knit stitches i got at the library just the other day seems to have filled the ticket. for a project like this, i wanted to use something that makes a denser stitch, to protect the surface of the machine, but i wanted it to be textural- something the hdc sack thing i was doing only halfway covered. the stitch i'm doing at this moment looks like a honeycomb sort of thing, with nice texture lines in between, so i'm digging it. i'm using brown sheep's cotton fleece and i'm thinking i've found my all-season cotton blend yarn. it's got a nice texture, good colors, a little sheen, not much fuzz. i don't like the fact that it splits into strands a lot when i'm working with it, but the yarn's been nicely tolerant of my abuses so far otherwise.
i've also got an art/craft show/sale coming up this week (littman gallery, on campus at portland state u) and feeling the pressure. it's two days so i need to have inventory (which shouldn't be too much of a problem, etsy's slow at the moment; one reason i jumped at the trade!) but it's got to be the right inventory. it's on a college campus, so i'm thinking i'll leave the baby afghans at home. hate to be stereotypical, especially as the college from which i graduated (university of north texas) had such a large number of non-traditional students. but i regard those pieces quite seriously as heirloom quality and don't really want them pawed at, especially by people who may be admiring but may have smudgy hands and no intent to make them their own.
boy i think i'm coming off rude and snotty today. i think i'll end this as it lies now, and go switch out laundry. i'll try not to hurt anyone's feelings on the way down. hopefully the results of laundry will please me, as there's a nice big bright pink bags in there felting.
my mom no doubt, blames herself for this, and it's not for her lack of trying. sure, i get my days straight and am at work when i should be, but i'm not good when things are absolutely the same all the time. i create for myself wiggle room and then do sneaky things like sabotage my own plans by getting sick. example in point: last sunday's post that was never made up and languishes in my saved drafts file of oblivion. we won't even talk about how many saved drafts exist in my various google mail accounts. (let's be fair, i use them as notes to myself for things like upcoming column ideas, etc).
i have a set of bracelets that fears they will never see the light of day, i was derailed from that project, i think, a few weeks ago by needlefelting. i'm a little stuck on needlefelting at the moment and have been sidetracked again by a new/old favorite- railroad knitting.
it's also called afghan stitch, tunisian crochet and about a million other things, but since everyone assumes anything done with yarn and stick or sticks is knitting, i like the term railroad knitting. (i've also often considered getting a shirt that says something to the effect of, "no i'm crocheting" or a graphic of a hook and then an = crochet, but i'd hate to seem rude. plus it gives me a chance to talk to people a little bit about my much misunderstood art. craft. whatever.)
so i'm in the middle of a trade with a lovely etsian who wants a laptop sleeve to protect her precious in her backpack and sent out a call for knitters/crocheters. i guess i was the lucky winner, either that or she's got totally bored of waiting for me to get through my attention division/new job/sinus issues and has yet to let me know. she seems the gracious type though, so i think she may stick with me. i like the opportunity to try something new, especially with a captive audience, so the big old book of 101 tunisian/afghan/railroad knit stitches i got at the library just the other day seems to have filled the ticket. for a project like this, i wanted to use something that makes a denser stitch, to protect the surface of the machine, but i wanted it to be textural- something the hdc sack thing i was doing only halfway covered. the stitch i'm doing at this moment looks like a honeycomb sort of thing, with nice texture lines in between, so i'm digging it. i'm using brown sheep's cotton fleece and i'm thinking i've found my all-season cotton blend yarn. it's got a nice texture, good colors, a little sheen, not much fuzz. i don't like the fact that it splits into strands a lot when i'm working with it, but the yarn's been nicely tolerant of my abuses so far otherwise.
i've also got an art/craft show/sale coming up this week (littman gallery, on campus at portland state u) and feeling the pressure. it's two days so i need to have inventory (which shouldn't be too much of a problem, etsy's slow at the moment; one reason i jumped at the trade!) but it's got to be the right inventory. it's on a college campus, so i'm thinking i'll leave the baby afghans at home. hate to be stereotypical, especially as the college from which i graduated (university of north texas) had such a large number of non-traditional students. but i regard those pieces quite seriously as heirloom quality and don't really want them pawed at, especially by people who may be admiring but may have smudgy hands and no intent to make them their own.
boy i think i'm coming off rude and snotty today. i think i'll end this as it lies now, and go switch out laundry. i'll try not to hurt anyone's feelings on the way down. hopefully the results of laundry will please me, as there's a nice big bright pink bags in there felting.
2009/03/06
all kinds of starty-stoppy
i've been pushing myself to do a lot of fiberwork recently, as i've just become enamored of a new aspect of it, and have been feeling the spring fever (as well as the spring sinuses!) but it's been hard to coordinate the thousand little things that have to be done in order to "do" this fiberwork in a business sense at all.
blogging's been problematic for me this week, and earlier in the week, when i really really wanted to just needlefelt, i had to take pictures, edit them, do listings, etc. and now that the posting part has slowed down, i am kind of temporarily tired of needlefelting. it's the way i would tell my mom when i was a kid, re: foods, "it's not that i'm full, i'm just tired of the way this tastes." which, when said calmly, i'm pretty sure she accepted it.
(and to add to my scattered attention issues, i've just been solemnly brought bamboo type purse handles, by the newly deputized vacuum patroller. what to do with these?!?!)
anyway, i'm not full of needlefelting, i'm just a little tired of it at the moment.
and dmanit there's a spot of decent light, time to throw off the computer and take some pictures. grr!!!!
so my attention span for the past week or so has been fractured to say the least.
dangit and an etsy forum question, but the etsy forums are being slow as molasses to load. so, to pass the time, some photographs (hot off the windowsill!) of the work in progress:
(these pics are not really edited, so they're not etsy listing quality, there's your disclaimer.)
all of the pieces need work. it's true, but i am going to give myself a night off, just to avoid just throwing stuff on the sweaters. i'm afraid that lacking real energy might make me push designs on them instead of what the sweater is saying to me. oh dear. yes, i talk to fibers.
the above is on a lovely cardigan originally sold at the gap. it's got a little rabbit hair yarn in it so it feels really soft. i'm trying to keep it from looking country, but this looks a little like a folky pear. i'm also craving avocadoes.
not that anyone could tell. this sweater's an older looking avocado green light wool thing. at least this is a little more peacock feathery in shape. but i need to decide if i love it or if i'm tired of it. it's a really lovely motif, but how far will it go, really?
this one actually has a name, and it's the closest to being ready. it's an awesome bennetton sweater, albeit a small one. i wear smalls, preferring a snugger fit, but this is ridiculously snug. but for a smaller framed lass, this one's going to be gorgeous. inspired by all manner of blooms and blossoms. it's a little femme for my general tastes, but it was too pretty an idea to ignore, and the perfect color sweater on which to do it. it's not a cardigan, but it says early spring to me.
when i allow myself to get back to needlefelting tomorrow, this will be the first to be finished and posted to my shop.
blogging's been problematic for me this week, and earlier in the week, when i really really wanted to just needlefelt, i had to take pictures, edit them, do listings, etc. and now that the posting part has slowed down, i am kind of temporarily tired of needlefelting. it's the way i would tell my mom when i was a kid, re: foods, "it's not that i'm full, i'm just tired of the way this tastes." which, when said calmly, i'm pretty sure she accepted it.
(and to add to my scattered attention issues, i've just been solemnly brought bamboo type purse handles, by the newly deputized vacuum patroller. what to do with these?!?!)
anyway, i'm not full of needlefelting, i'm just a little tired of it at the moment.
and dmanit there's a spot of decent light, time to throw off the computer and take some pictures. grr!!!!
so my attention span for the past week or so has been fractured to say the least.
dangit and an etsy forum question, but the etsy forums are being slow as molasses to load. so, to pass the time, some photographs (hot off the windowsill!) of the work in progress:
(these pics are not really edited, so they're not etsy listing quality, there's your disclaimer.)
all of the pieces need work. it's true, but i am going to give myself a night off, just to avoid just throwing stuff on the sweaters. i'm afraid that lacking real energy might make me push designs on them instead of what the sweater is saying to me. oh dear. yes, i talk to fibers.
the above is on a lovely cardigan originally sold at the gap. it's got a little rabbit hair yarn in it so it feels really soft. i'm trying to keep it from looking country, but this looks a little like a folky pear. i'm also craving avocadoes.
not that anyone could tell. this sweater's an older looking avocado green light wool thing. at least this is a little more peacock feathery in shape. but i need to decide if i love it or if i'm tired of it. it's a really lovely motif, but how far will it go, really?
this one actually has a name, and it's the closest to being ready. it's an awesome bennetton sweater, albeit a small one. i wear smalls, preferring a snugger fit, but this is ridiculously snug. but for a smaller framed lass, this one's going to be gorgeous. inspired by all manner of blooms and blossoms. it's a little femme for my general tastes, but it was too pretty an idea to ignore, and the perfect color sweater on which to do it. it's not a cardigan, but it says early spring to me.when i allow myself to get back to needlefelting tomorrow, this will be the first to be finished and posted to my shop.
2009/03/02
ojodios/practical magic
i think i realize why i like the new-to-me god's eye motif- it's a good representation of my brain.
it's going five or seven different directions and i'd like very much to do today's blog entry, rather than yesterday's.
it's incomplete and unposted and it's going to require me digging around in my favorites list on etsy. but i'm running this show and everyone seems to prefer it when i'm eased up on that, so i'm moving the share the love until wednesday. that sounds like a good day for it. don't you agree?
i mean, you do agree, right?
(i'm nodding my head here, pulling you on with me).
the story of yesterday is this great burst of energy, a whole lot done, and a whole lot more intended to do. my brain and energy have clicked into a different gear recently, and i realized today, while at work, that visualization is more powerful than i thought previously, and that it has a lot of influence on what manifests.
this is a liberating yet sobering thought. in our actions, we're only treading down grooves/tracks that we've already laid. but that means taking responsibility for daydreams, and when your airy fairy type friends say things about "follow your own bliss" they neglect to mention that actually doing it is a lot of work. it's not about the path of least resistance, passion only flows that way in fiction.
(and here's where i contemplate all that, and one of my role models and send a mental emotional heart to tiff, hope she gets that.)
but so. yesterday and today have both been punctuated with things that it was absolutely clear to me that they needed to be done.
there was cooking and cleaning, and i needlefelted a cardigan:
this is my very safe workspace! really! no really, i can't wait until we get a slightly larger place. the countertop/bar is an okay height to work at, standing, but our table's a little taller still so it will be great for feltwork. it's a dark picture, but i promise, mom, all the lights were on and i wasn't straining my eyes. that pattern is called the god's eye, and i have seen it previously as an embroidery stitch.
that's not such a good picture, but you get the general idea. i'm hopeless so far at embroidery, but most of the women in my family have a cross stitch/crewel/needlepoint embroidery project in their life repetoire, so i've been exposed to it and have an appreciation for it. i also have a needlepoint project that i've been working on for nearly a decade. one day, that pillow with frogs and dragonflies on it will be done! and as god is my witness, i'll never do needlepoint again! (sorry, channeling my inner southern belle. it's in there. don't laugh.)
so, needlefelting seems like a good way to explore these stitches i love. it's not exactly the same, but one can take advantage of fiber texture to create movement and interesting detail.
this god's eye is really basic, and i've already got much more ambitious ideas. but it's a fun thing to do with brightly colored yarn.
this pocket is a little more sedate:
and i don't necessarily love the colors; i think they pull the design into borderline timidity. or are they keeping the design subtle? i like the shading in the leaf shapes, and enjoyed doing it. the lines around the circles are interesting:
and i'll be exploring that some more. i've been playing with that idea in my head for a while so it was interesting to see it come out.
that's another look at it, and already i see so many things that i'll have the opportunity to do better, soon.
i think i'd like to add these to my shop, consider this my statement of intention: these are my coming attractions. i would have the ability to do different sizes, in completely one-off designs, relatively affordably. i'd be upcycling, as i'd be getting sweaters secondhand. if they didn't come with cool buttons (mine came with black faceted shiny plastic ones- i can't decide how i feel about them)- that's easy to fix.
i have been looking at felt and fiber to try to get a fix on the colors that are out there and am very happy to have done so. now i need to learn the sweaters. i have ideas about embellishing seams, modifying sleeve length.
i'm visualizing one specific cardigna, and i think i'm going to start getting supplies together for it tomorrow. i think i'm liking this spring energy, feeling productive is so cool.
it's going five or seven different directions and i'd like very much to do today's blog entry, rather than yesterday's.
it's incomplete and unposted and it's going to require me digging around in my favorites list on etsy. but i'm running this show and everyone seems to prefer it when i'm eased up on that, so i'm moving the share the love until wednesday. that sounds like a good day for it. don't you agree?
i mean, you do agree, right?
(i'm nodding my head here, pulling you on with me).
the story of yesterday is this great burst of energy, a whole lot done, and a whole lot more intended to do. my brain and energy have clicked into a different gear recently, and i realized today, while at work, that visualization is more powerful than i thought previously, and that it has a lot of influence on what manifests.
this is a liberating yet sobering thought. in our actions, we're only treading down grooves/tracks that we've already laid. but that means taking responsibility for daydreams, and when your airy fairy type friends say things about "follow your own bliss" they neglect to mention that actually doing it is a lot of work. it's not about the path of least resistance, passion only flows that way in fiction.
(and here's where i contemplate all that, and one of my role models and send a mental emotional heart to tiff, hope she gets that.)
but so. yesterday and today have both been punctuated with things that it was absolutely clear to me that they needed to be done.
there was cooking and cleaning, and i needlefelted a cardigan:
this is my very safe workspace! really! no really, i can't wait until we get a slightly larger place. the countertop/bar is an okay height to work at, standing, but our table's a little taller still so it will be great for feltwork. it's a dark picture, but i promise, mom, all the lights were on and i wasn't straining my eyes. that pattern is called the god's eye, and i have seen it previously as an embroidery stitch.
that's not such a good picture, but you get the general idea. i'm hopeless so far at embroidery, but most of the women in my family have a cross stitch/crewel/needlepoint embroidery project in their life repetoire, so i've been exposed to it and have an appreciation for it. i also have a needlepoint project that i've been working on for nearly a decade. one day, that pillow with frogs and dragonflies on it will be done! and as god is my witness, i'll never do needlepoint again! (sorry, channeling my inner southern belle. it's in there. don't laugh.)so, needlefelting seems like a good way to explore these stitches i love. it's not exactly the same, but one can take advantage of fiber texture to create movement and interesting detail.
this god's eye is really basic, and i've already got much more ambitious ideas. but it's a fun thing to do with brightly colored yarn.
this pocket is a little more sedate:
and i don't necessarily love the colors; i think they pull the design into borderline timidity. or are they keeping the design subtle? i like the shading in the leaf shapes, and enjoyed doing it. the lines around the circles are interesting:
and i'll be exploring that some more. i've been playing with that idea in my head for a while so it was interesting to see it come out.
that's another look at it, and already i see so many things that i'll have the opportunity to do better, soon.i think i'd like to add these to my shop, consider this my statement of intention: these are my coming attractions. i would have the ability to do different sizes, in completely one-off designs, relatively affordably. i'd be upcycling, as i'd be getting sweaters secondhand. if they didn't come with cool buttons (mine came with black faceted shiny plastic ones- i can't decide how i feel about them)- that's easy to fix.
i have been looking at felt and fiber to try to get a fix on the colors that are out there and am very happy to have done so. now i need to learn the sweaters. i have ideas about embellishing seams, modifying sleeve length.
i'm visualizing one specific cardigna, and i think i'm going to start getting supplies together for it tomorrow. i think i'm liking this spring energy, feeling productive is so cool.
2009/03/01
sunday, got in the way
have all kinds of an ambitious-type entry saved, but unfortunately my busy sunday got in the way. all will be explained tomorrow, with another late share the love installment, included.
2009/02/27
friday
nothing like a return to other people's schedule and expectations to make one welcome friday.
it's so arbitrary and it happens every week, yet i can't help but mildly celebrate its arrival/existence. a few minutes early to work this morning (quite a short drive), i got to enjoy a whole song of regina spektor's, a pretty melodic and echoing piece that suited this morning's bright sky quite well. things are greening. and i'd already had coffee, breakfast, made a listing on etsy.
the eye one
which i adore, specifically due to the adaptation of the embroidery stitch to needlefelting. i love a lot of embroidery motifs, but at this point, i am not an embroiderer. there is a certain appreciation for color, texture, fiber qualities that exists within embroidery, and so i'm interested in taking these old techniques and needlefelting them. well that's an ambitious statement, as this pouch itself is one of the first in the projects that do this.
there's a camel-colored felted bag that's accented with a warm blue and nice dark red that's just gorgeous- it's upcoming. i'm having difficulty finding a suitable button- i'm looking for a nice plain wooden one, on a shank. tougher than it sounds. it's fabulous. should i end up ever with a nice camel colored coat, i'd like that motif to go somewhere upon it, in those colors too. but this pouch is a more tropical assortment of colors, and there's nothing wrong with that either.
an enjoyable evening planned, some baked polenta fries (gotten from 101 cookbooks, a food blog i've come to find really reliable and quality) and broccoli, perhaps a cartoon movie from studio ghibli- one of the few types of movies the three of us find agreeable. maybe some stove popped popcorn, maybe some roasted garbanzo beans. the fantastic feeling of leisure, which i'm sure i will muss up with finding something yarn-related to work on. oh well, if i can't pet a cat, i can at least mess with sheep hair. planning tomorrow's breakfast all the while.
it's so arbitrary and it happens every week, yet i can't help but mildly celebrate its arrival/existence. a few minutes early to work this morning (quite a short drive), i got to enjoy a whole song of regina spektor's, a pretty melodic and echoing piece that suited this morning's bright sky quite well. things are greening. and i'd already had coffee, breakfast, made a listing on etsy.
the eye onewhich i adore, specifically due to the adaptation of the embroidery stitch to needlefelting. i love a lot of embroidery motifs, but at this point, i am not an embroiderer. there is a certain appreciation for color, texture, fiber qualities that exists within embroidery, and so i'm interested in taking these old techniques and needlefelting them. well that's an ambitious statement, as this pouch itself is one of the first in the projects that do this.
there's a camel-colored felted bag that's accented with a warm blue and nice dark red that's just gorgeous- it's upcoming. i'm having difficulty finding a suitable button- i'm looking for a nice plain wooden one, on a shank. tougher than it sounds. it's fabulous. should i end up ever with a nice camel colored coat, i'd like that motif to go somewhere upon it, in those colors too. but this pouch is a more tropical assortment of colors, and there's nothing wrong with that either.
an enjoyable evening planned, some baked polenta fries (gotten from 101 cookbooks, a food blog i've come to find really reliable and quality) and broccoli, perhaps a cartoon movie from studio ghibli- one of the few types of movies the three of us find agreeable. maybe some stove popped popcorn, maybe some roasted garbanzo beans. the fantastic feeling of leisure, which i'm sure i will muss up with finding something yarn-related to work on. oh well, if i can't pet a cat, i can at least mess with sheep hair. planning tomorrow's breakfast all the while.
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